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Now It's Time For Noel Gal-agher




















Noel Gallagher choked on his Coco Pops yesterday when he saw a bikini-clad Russell Brand camping it up on my page and declaring his love for the Oasis star.

Russ was about to text his snap to pal Noel for his 40th birthday. Daubed on the comic’s belly was: “Noel, I love you too” – and round his neck was a garland.

The Bizarre Shagger Of The Year 2006 also quipped he fancies becoming top gay swordsman – and claiming Noel as his first scalp.

I thought we had a strictly platonic relationship based on nothing more than our rapier-like wit and a mutual lusting for my missus.

“Seems all along he’s just wanted to use me like one of his blow-up dolls. I’m disgusted yet strangely intrigued.”

Now I fear Noel’s intrigue could lead to curiosity – and another rash picture. Russ is in Hawaii filming rom-com Forgetting Sarah Marshall, directed by Nicholas Stoller.

So my artist boffins have mocked up the sort of Noel snap Russ might expect on his mobile soon . .

Source: www.thesun.co.uk

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